Was it our second night in the hostel. It was in the evening. The night fell quickly and Paul and I biked back from the north-west corner of Central Kyoto, from Kinkakuji. We lied on our bunk-beds in silence, listing to the exhaustion of our bodies.
It wasn't long before Shawn woke up, or rather, it was the man soon to be known as Shawn. Paul was the first to talk to him. He introduced himself saying he was from Liverpool and then asked Shawn his name. He and his friend were from Singapore; Shawn had been studying in Japan for the last 2 years at a university in Tokyo; His friend Mitchel had just arrived from traveling in Korea.
At this time I opened my eyes and fell into conversation.
We talked bout our lives in Japan as different kinds of foreigners: those who look white and those who look oriential, and how this has affected out experiences. We also talked about how people act outside their cultures, and concentrated on Americans.
At this point Shawn thanked me for breaking his stereotype on Americans. He then explained what he meant. As a whole Americans who come to study in Japan are misguided in their actions. Shawn explained how the American students at his school act intolerably pompous about minuscule accomplishments; as an example he told me of one of his classmates that carries around the Nihon Shoki and reads from it in Japanese, not understanding what he is saying, and with a thick, indistinguishable accent. He also comented on the unhealthy obsessive behavior many have with anime, manga and video games. His biggest complaint is American's unfounded arrogance.
Why do we have so much arrogance? Or rather, why do we project feigned arrogance?
28.12.09
Kyoto Travels: Awkward In-betweeners.
It was a sleepless night of traveling, but satisfying. Paul and I staggered away from Kyoto station and up Shijo-dori. On our walk northward I saw more foreigners than I ever previously had in Japan. But not a single person stared.
We rested at the Buddhist temple, Higashi Honganji. It was early morning and a coincidence. The sun had just risen and the sky had a seamless-gray overcast. There was a man with a leaf-blower polishing the grounds, and sleepy visitors were groggily bobbing about. We sat on the tatami-floor of the main building as the echo-singing of a ceremony started. Various young monks were tidying up and lighting candles. We sat unmoving; with more of a thirst for sleep than any religious enlightenment.
After our rest we continued north to the hostel. What I felt when we arrived is a difficult sensation to explain, but both Paul and I had it. For all the time we had spent in Kyushu we had never seen so many non-native people, and especially not congregated in one place. Its not as if we were shocked; we expected Kyoto to be a tourist center. Its more like we were unsettled.
And the sensation lingered.
I contribute that feeling to the slow cultural acclimation we experienced by going to school in Japan. Other foreigners seemed awestruck and slightly scared. Its not like we were unsociable with tourists, it just felt like we didn't belong. At the same time we aren't Japanese nor fluent, or even from Kyoto. We were in between everyone.
I thought it would be easy to slip into a crowd of people who look and talk like me; I thought it would be like putting on an old comfortable pair of shoes, but it wasn't. It was awkward.
It makes me wonder how I will react when I return to America. Have I had a sort of internal alteration; the quite kind, that doesn't show its face until its unavoidable? I know my perspective on the condition of our humanity as a whole has been altered by my time here, but I didn't know it would effect my individual behavior with people. If it even has at all.
I guess this proves I can never understand the resounding effects my experiences have on me. Even if I try.
We rested at the Buddhist temple, Higashi Honganji. It was early morning and a coincidence. The sun had just risen and the sky had a seamless-gray overcast. There was a man with a leaf-blower polishing the grounds, and sleepy visitors were groggily bobbing about. We sat on the tatami-floor of the main building as the echo-singing of a ceremony started. Various young monks were tidying up and lighting candles. We sat unmoving; with more of a thirst for sleep than any religious enlightenment.
After our rest we continued north to the hostel. What I felt when we arrived is a difficult sensation to explain, but both Paul and I had it. For all the time we had spent in Kyushu we had never seen so many non-native people, and especially not congregated in one place. Its not as if we were shocked; we expected Kyoto to be a tourist center. Its more like we were unsettled.
And the sensation lingered.
I contribute that feeling to the slow cultural acclimation we experienced by going to school in Japan. Other foreigners seemed awestruck and slightly scared. Its not like we were unsociable with tourists, it just felt like we didn't belong. At the same time we aren't Japanese nor fluent, or even from Kyoto. We were in between everyone.
I thought it would be easy to slip into a crowd of people who look and talk like me; I thought it would be like putting on an old comfortable pair of shoes, but it wasn't. It was awkward.
It makes me wonder how I will react when I return to America. Have I had a sort of internal alteration; the quite kind, that doesn't show its face until its unavoidable? I know my perspective on the condition of our humanity as a whole has been altered by my time here, but I didn't know it would effect my individual behavior with people. If it even has at all.
I guess this proves I can never understand the resounding effects my experiences have on me. Even if I try.
22.12.09
Halfway there
When you are truly living in a moment you don’t notice it; it slides by with ease and speed. However if you appreciate those instances, you inevitably end up stepping back, cocking your head to one side and reflecting. In hindsight memories are spread out on the table like photographs from a shoebox. You circle around the display, pace twice, and hunch over with your hands on each corner. The restlessness passes and you simple exhale and take a look. From there you have insight, the ability to relive and actually notice what you’ve learned, and understand what is worth cherishing. It’s nostalgic, necessary and happening all the time. These are my twilight-days in Japan. It’s about time I sat down and had a little look.
In a few moments I am heading out the door to Sumiyoshi. From there I'm catching a bus to Kyoto and riding it until morning. Maybe I'll find something there. Conditions are right, I think.
In a few moments I am heading out the door to Sumiyoshi. From there I'm catching a bus to Kyoto and riding it until morning. Maybe I'll find something there. Conditions are right, I think.
17.12.09
8 O'clock and nothing
Everyone has individuality; remember that the next time you think in terms of connections. We interact with people everyday, many with which we give little thought to. We don't necessarily see these people as important or even consequential, but they are. Moreover, they hold the possibility to impact, they hold their own importance; they posses their own motives, intentions and daily routine. Everyone has concerns, stresses and thoughts. Because of this everyone is inevitably, and primarily, concerned with themselves. So in a sense, selfishness is at the core of our humanity.
Now I don't mean selfishness in the sense of coveting resources or positions. What I mean is broader sense of selfishness; it is a sort of self-preservation, a justification in oneself. Everyone plays the leading role in their life, so of course the limelight is focused. But because of this concentrated self-importance people often forget the concerns of others, or if they are not forgotten, they are misunderstood. And we seem to revel in our misunderstanding.
We tease. We stereotype. We hate. We perpetuate.
Regardless, we strive to connect. We want to be understood. We are compelled to people the way snow falls to the ground: delicately, inevitably and with force.
Our individuality is precious, but it is also a cause of our loneliness.
Now I don't mean selfishness in the sense of coveting resources or positions. What I mean is broader sense of selfishness; it is a sort of self-preservation, a justification in oneself. Everyone plays the leading role in their life, so of course the limelight is focused. But because of this concentrated self-importance people often forget the concerns of others, or if they are not forgotten, they are misunderstood. And we seem to revel in our misunderstanding.
We tease. We stereotype. We hate. We perpetuate.
Regardless, we strive to connect. We want to be understood. We are compelled to people the way snow falls to the ground: delicately, inevitably and with force.
Our individuality is precious, but it is also a cause of our loneliness.
16.12.09
Comentary on Japanese "Higher Education"
There are many things about Japan I love: the high-contrasting mountains raising up and bowing down over the ocean, the aged wood and patterned carvings of ancient edifices, and bustling alleys, filled with makeshift storefronts, and how their goods threaten to pile on the road. These are just a few examples. However, in my opinion, Japan is lacking in a fundamentally important category: higher education.
My experiences with college life in Japan have been educationally disappointing. Professors do not need any particular credentials to teach Japanese to foreigners, nor do they need any higher-developed degrees to teach to Japanese students. A professor with a P.H.D standing is in the minority.
A university student in America has an innate trust that the individual holding the position of "teacher" has more knowledge than the student. This is something that is taken for granted. I am shocked that Japan, arguably Asia's more developed nation, does not have stricter standards of educational qualifications. Here professors are not specialized. At my college professors are generalists, often with no teaching qualifications or knowledge.
One of the most prominent examples of this is their minimal slew of foreign teachers (which is one of the lowest statistics in developed nations). These individuals often have no other qualifications than a standard four-year university degree. Many of these individuals come from the JET program, which temps Japanophile-Americans with year long contracts to teach English in the country they have a perpetual boner for. (I know, that was rather cynical).
The idea sounds good. An individual coming from a four year university has more knowledge and academic experience than the average person. However, a person can be a genius, but without knowing how to teach they are rendered profoundly ineffective.
Recently I had a run in with my college's French professor at a bar. He was more than slightly inebriated (which was not the first time I had seen him this way) and vulgarly socializing with other students. By chance, or lack of standing room, we were pressed into the same corner. He was ranting about the increased number of tattooed youth in America. In an effort to alleviate the surmounting tension from the other Americans I brought up the topic of "irezumi", or traditional Japanese tattooing. Now, according to The Kodansha Encyclopedia of Japan and a record in the Nihon Shoki (720) tattooing in Japan was used as a form of punishment. To the extent in which kanji characters such as aku (bad) and inu (dog) were tattooed on the forehead. When I suggested that tattooing had once been used in this way, the professor quickly dismissed the idea and pressed the notion that it originated in the yakuza. Not only was his information stereotyped and inaccurate, but he also showed no interest in considering other possibilities.
The professionals are a core issue, but naturally the system is the factory perpetuating them. According to Yoshio Sugimoto (in his book on Japanese society) the Japanese educational system produces individuals without critical thinking skills. He states:
“On the pretext of avoiding subjective evaluation, these criteria give priority to the supposedly objective appraisal of pupils’ capacities to memorize facts, numbers, and events and solve mathematical and scientific equations. This framework attaches little importance to the development of creative thinking, original problem formulation, and critical analysis in the area of social issues and political debates.Thus, rote learning and repeated drilling are the predominate feature of Japan’s education, particularly at secondary-school level, where examination culture permeates deep into the classroom. Consequently, Japanese students rank high in international comparisons of mathematical and scientific test results. The nation’s school system produces an army of youngsters who have had excellent training in basic factual knowledge but limited education in critical social thinking.”
In my Japanese class the use of English is limited, if not forbidden. Moreover, at least 2 (if not 3) out of the 4 Japanese professors I have speak almost no English. I can understand the desire for immersion teaching, but a professor should be able to help the student in their natural language. Especially if the student is struggling to comprehend. In my class there are a few native English speakers who have completely give up; they have lost faith in learning in this environment. Instead of actually striving to understand grammatical patterns our professors want us to memorize and recite, verbatim, sentences from the book without even attempting to understand their meaning.
I never quite appreciated the way American universities are formulated until I experienced their polar opposite.
My experiences with college life in Japan have been educationally disappointing. Professors do not need any particular credentials to teach Japanese to foreigners, nor do they need any higher-developed degrees to teach to Japanese students. A professor with a P.H.D standing is in the minority.
A university student in America has an innate trust that the individual holding the position of "teacher" has more knowledge than the student. This is something that is taken for granted. I am shocked that Japan, arguably Asia's more developed nation, does not have stricter standards of educational qualifications. Here professors are not specialized. At my college professors are generalists, often with no teaching qualifications or knowledge.
One of the most prominent examples of this is their minimal slew of foreign teachers (which is one of the lowest statistics in developed nations). These individuals often have no other qualifications than a standard four-year university degree. Many of these individuals come from the JET program, which temps Japanophile-Americans with year long contracts to teach English in the country they have a perpetual boner for. (I know, that was rather cynical).
The idea sounds good. An individual coming from a four year university has more knowledge and academic experience than the average person. However, a person can be a genius, but without knowing how to teach they are rendered profoundly ineffective.
Recently I had a run in with my college's French professor at a bar. He was more than slightly inebriated (which was not the first time I had seen him this way) and vulgarly socializing with other students. By chance, or lack of standing room, we were pressed into the same corner. He was ranting about the increased number of tattooed youth in America. In an effort to alleviate the surmounting tension from the other Americans I brought up the topic of "irezumi", or traditional Japanese tattooing. Now, according to The Kodansha Encyclopedia of Japan and a record in the Nihon Shoki (720) tattooing in Japan was used as a form of punishment. To the extent in which kanji characters such as aku (bad) and inu (dog) were tattooed on the forehead. When I suggested that tattooing had once been used in this way, the professor quickly dismissed the idea and pressed the notion that it originated in the yakuza. Not only was his information stereotyped and inaccurate, but he also showed no interest in considering other possibilities.
The professionals are a core issue, but naturally the system is the factory perpetuating them. According to Yoshio Sugimoto (in his book on Japanese society) the Japanese educational system produces individuals without critical thinking skills. He states:
“On the pretext of avoiding subjective evaluation, these criteria give priority to the supposedly objective appraisal of pupils’ capacities to memorize facts, numbers, and events and solve mathematical and scientific equations. This framework attaches little importance to the development of creative thinking, original problem formulation, and critical analysis in the area of social issues and political debates.Thus, rote learning and repeated drilling are the predominate feature of Japan’s education, particularly at secondary-school level, where examination culture permeates deep into the classroom. Consequently, Japanese students rank high in international comparisons of mathematical and scientific test results. The nation’s school system produces an army of youngsters who have had excellent training in basic factual knowledge but limited education in critical social thinking.”
In my Japanese class the use of English is limited, if not forbidden. Moreover, at least 2 (if not 3) out of the 4 Japanese professors I have speak almost no English. I can understand the desire for immersion teaching, but a professor should be able to help the student in their natural language. Especially if the student is struggling to comprehend. In my class there are a few native English speakers who have completely give up; they have lost faith in learning in this environment. Instead of actually striving to understand grammatical patterns our professors want us to memorize and recite, verbatim, sentences from the book without even attempting to understand their meaning.
I never quite appreciated the way American universities are formulated until I experienced their polar opposite.
15.12.09
やきとり
I'm sketching to try to become adjusted to drawing again. Its been a long, long time, and I am more than just a little rusty. This one, along with the marker rendering of the street in front of Yumesaito, and the tree from Suwa Shrine, are all I have so far.頑張ってね。
Shifting considerations.
You can never escape moments of reflection. Whether you want too or not, you find yourself thinking. It is usually nothing, just nonchalantly tracing over something nostalgic. It starts out innocently enough, until it steadily cavalcades towards a headache. I'm having one of those moments now, and I think I've been here for the greater half of this month.
Lately I have been having a reevaluation of priorities, and a reconsidering of what I want. When I moved to New York I did it for opportunity. I started school without hesitation, and absorbed myself in a major I saw as a sensible solution. Maybe I got caught up in the idea of progressing, or maybe it was escapism. Either way, I chose design because it seemed like a way to make money while doing something I found tolerable. It was not desire for happiness, but toleration; just a door to survival.
But its more than that really. Nothing is simple. Everything is constantly evolving. I grew fond of developing a skill-set and the possibilities I felt. Because of that change, that evolution of motives, I am caught in this moment of reflection. I think it was triggered by my life here: I have been in Japan for quite a few months now, and my time here has certainly been a catalyst for many things. One of which is reconsidering the reasons why my life is headed in a straight line. Nothing is as simple as a straight line, so something must be array.
I think it is impossible to have total faith in the choices you've made in life. But, to make it clear, I am also not talking about regret. What I mean is more like curiosity for a new level of analytical self-awareness. As far as my education is considered I chose design, and with one semester left, I am not retracting my decision. However, I am thinking about how I want to use what I have developed. And in which ways I can apply them in order to generate something more satisfactory than mere toleration. After all, I design but I am not just design.
No one is "just" anything.
Which brings me to my interest: People, human relationships, societal changes and cultural adaptations. And art, lets not forget that.
Then perhaps design wasn't a wrong turn? It can involve all of what I mentioned above. Perhaps I should use my skills unconventionally; to be concentrated on a goal rather than a livelihood. I wonder if I should develop this idea, or at least follow a similar direction. If I could use my skill-set to make a difference, if it could change things, then perhaps it is a goal worth working towards. I could be satisfied at least. Idealistic, I know, but without crazy ideas nothing would happen. So maybe I am on the right track, or at least near one. I just have no idea how to do it just yet.
But what I do know is that a 9-5 job will devastate me. I feel it would make me void; it would be living in shades of gray. I am too ambitious to be typesetting newspaper ads. And I am too suborn to concede to the idea of it. I don't want to waste my life making money. I never have. And I am scared of the idea that my life could end up that way.
So I wont let it. Or at least go down with gunfire.
Lately I have been having a reevaluation of priorities, and a reconsidering of what I want. When I moved to New York I did it for opportunity. I started school without hesitation, and absorbed myself in a major I saw as a sensible solution. Maybe I got caught up in the idea of progressing, or maybe it was escapism. Either way, I chose design because it seemed like a way to make money while doing something I found tolerable. It was not desire for happiness, but toleration; just a door to survival.
But its more than that really. Nothing is simple. Everything is constantly evolving. I grew fond of developing a skill-set and the possibilities I felt. Because of that change, that evolution of motives, I am caught in this moment of reflection. I think it was triggered by my life here: I have been in Japan for quite a few months now, and my time here has certainly been a catalyst for many things. One of which is reconsidering the reasons why my life is headed in a straight line. Nothing is as simple as a straight line, so something must be array.
I think it is impossible to have total faith in the choices you've made in life. But, to make it clear, I am also not talking about regret. What I mean is more like curiosity for a new level of analytical self-awareness. As far as my education is considered I chose design, and with one semester left, I am not retracting my decision. However, I am thinking about how I want to use what I have developed. And in which ways I can apply them in order to generate something more satisfactory than mere toleration. After all, I design but I am not just design.
No one is "just" anything.
Which brings me to my interest: People, human relationships, societal changes and cultural adaptations. And art, lets not forget that.
Then perhaps design wasn't a wrong turn? It can involve all of what I mentioned above. Perhaps I should use my skills unconventionally; to be concentrated on a goal rather than a livelihood. I wonder if I should develop this idea, or at least follow a similar direction. If I could use my skill-set to make a difference, if it could change things, then perhaps it is a goal worth working towards. I could be satisfied at least. Idealistic, I know, but without crazy ideas nothing would happen. So maybe I am on the right track, or at least near one. I just have no idea how to do it just yet.
But what I do know is that a 9-5 job will devastate me. I feel it would make me void; it would be living in shades of gray. I am too ambitious to be typesetting newspaper ads. And I am too suborn to concede to the idea of it. I don't want to waste my life making money. I never have. And I am scared of the idea that my life could end up that way.
So I wont let it. Or at least go down with gunfire.
私の長崎
今月私はアメリカに帰る。日本に来て以来、たくさんの忘れられない経験がありました。ここにいるの思い出を全然覚えたい。いろんな旅行した。後で写真に置くかも。
これは、旅行時にさまざまところで絵を書いた。１．ユメサイトウ前に ２．スワ神社で。カメラで取ったのでちょっと悪いでしょうね。ごめんね。
これは、旅行時にさまざまところで絵を書いた。１．ユメサイトウ前に ２．スワ神社で。カメラで取ったのでちょっと悪いでしょうね。ごめんね。
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